“When the SAS is called upon to do what we’re trained to do, we have been likened to a surgeon cutting out a cancer. It’s a filthy and difficult job. We don’t like doing it, but it’s our duty.”
-Colonel Hadley (Tony Doyle), The Final Option (1982)
On March 18, Guy Ritchie’s next movie is set to be released. Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre is an action/comedy that stars Jason Statham, Josh Hartnett and Hugh Grant. If the trailer is any indication, this one’s going to be pretty good.
Sadly, my home state is still requiring wearing masks while in the theater. I’m not down with paying a chunk of change for the privilege of covering my face for a couple of hours. I may have to wait for this one to come out on home media.
“No respectable gentleman is that respectable.”
-Edward Pierce (Sean Connery), The Great Train Robbery (1978)
Happy New Year, folks. I’m hoping 2022 is an improvement over 2021, but I’m not holding my breath. Things have to start getting better eventually, right? I just hope I live long enough to see it.
“Next to me in the blackness lay my oiled blue steel beauty. The greatest Christmas gift I had ever received, or would ever receive. Gradually, I drifted off to sleep, pranging ducks on the wing and getting off spectacular hip shots.”
-Ralphie as an Adult (Jean Shepherd), A Christmas Story (1983)
I almost forgot what day it is. Happy Festivus, everyone. I’m too tired for feats of strength. And I’d be typing all day if I aired my grievances here. I guess I’ll just limit it to one grievance: They started playing Christmas music on the local radio stations the day after Halloween. That’s almost two f*cking months of Christmas music! I’d call it too much of a good thing, but I’m not keen enough on holiday music to call it a good thing.
Speaking of good things, here’s a Seinfeld clip featuring some Festivus miracles.
“I’m to extend to you every facility, short of endangering the lives of the crew. That could include a pint of medicinal whiskey – if you happen to be seasick.”
-Commander Ferraday (Rock Hudson), Ice Station Zebra (1968)
Once upon a time, I used to work in retail loss prevention. I started out as a store detective catching shoplifters, then I advanced to LP manager where I was responsible for supervising detectives and conducting internal theft investigations. I was in that line of work for twelve years full time and two years part time. I’ve never really regretted my decision to move on to greener pastures, but with all that’s going on today, I’m even more certain I made the right decision.
How the hell do you handle swarms of people smashing display cases, loading up and running out the door? The only thing you can do is call the cops and wait for help to arrive. But these days it seems that help may not be on the way. And what would be the point? Prosecutors in a lot of these jurisdictions where this stuff is happening won’t even pursue the cases. It’s a sad state of affairs, to be sure.
“And that’s why we’re at the top of the food chain!”
-Burt Gummer (Michael Gross), Tremors 3: Back to Perfection (2001)
Nobody Move! 